Dating breaking up your best friend

You two used to say how you hated everyone except for one another, and now what? If you haven’t mourned, let yourself do so for one more night with arms flopped and the lights out and ugly cries galore. Then ask: How long has it been since you’ve not been a half of something?

Then, in the morning, shower to an upbeat playlist (full of artists you’ve never heard before so as to avoid what was once “your song”). How long has it been since you’ve given yourself the opportunity to finish your own sentences? Remember how it feels to turn left without a tug to the right.

You made a real connection with this person and whether it’s your decision or his to end the relationship, it’s hard to let go. Not only is he the guy you can tackle and make out with at any given moment, but he was also your best friend.

Those relationships are anything but simple to end. Sadly, not everyone is that understanding and you’re going to get some fake laughs along with some looks. You were in a relationship with this person, so it’s a given things are going to make you think of him.

Help MR: How do you deal with a best-friend breakup? It’s a rare and enlightened human who takes actual comfort in being told “time heals all wounds,” that “you’ll get over it eventually” and “you’ll meet someone new.” One of the few things my 29 years on this planet have taught me is that all of those things have proven to be true, and yet they don’t make reality any better when you’re slogging through the end of something that was wonderful. This hurts so badly because the person you used to call anytime literally anything happened to you — promotions, confrontations, big loves, awful awkward moments, bowel movements — is no longer your person to call.

It’s been one week since my best friend and I “ended it.” The decision was mutual and I think it’s a mature one given that things will never go back to the way they were, but this sucks so much. The protector and harborer of your deepest secrets, she who was tasked with clearing your reputation-damning search history should you die in a freak accident, the one who has seen you do (and has done with you) weird, weird things is now, instead, just another human on this planet.

When you look at seemingly happy celebrity couples like Ashton Kutcher and Mila Kunis, or Leslie Mann and Judd Apatow, not only do they appear to be in love, but they also seem to genuinely enjoy hanging out together.

You have so many punchlines stored that no one else could possible get. Buff yourself shiny like a bow-wrapped birthday bicycle and greet yourself as a naked, solo entity in the mirror.

When something is wrong, he’s not there to make you feel better.

You have your girls to help you through the rough times, but it’s not the same. He’s the one person that would know what to say to make everything instantly better.

There are obvious steps for getting over a guy, like getting under another and moving on; but losing your best friend along with it is an entirely different concept. The best way to get over is that cliché – time heals all.

Even if that means grabbing a pint of Ben & Jerry’s and crying through a Nicholas Sparks movie.

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Hello and welcome to our advice column, “Ask MR,” where we answer your burning questions in the hopes of being the ointment to your life rash.

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